Workin’ For The Man..

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Rant about work. I know, it’s been awhile. I know that I haven’t even caught y’all up with what’s been going on. I’m pissed right now with the man. That’s right. The man. Man who writes my fucking my paycheck. The man I thought was actually a decent human being.

Until today.

Our new uniform pants came in the other day at work. I’ve already been a little upset that these are men’s pants.

I’m a woman! A femme woman. A femme woman with curves.

Yes. In the past, I’ve worn men’s pants and jeans on a regular basis. I’m actually in search for a good ol’ worn out pair of men’s jeans for summer. I have a thing for white muscle tanks during the summer and they’re great with ripped, comfy men’s jeans.

This is work. A place where I should feel confident at all times on the clock. A place where I spend ten hours out of my day. Men’s pants are not everyday wear for me. They are not confident for me. They are lounging around the house or running errands. I have hips that feel squished in men’s pants.

Think of binding for your hips and ass. That’s what they feel like for me. So, I went with a size smaller than my actual hip size. Which means I wear them up higher. Thus, accentuating my hips and slimming my tummy. They even make me look a little taller wearing them this way. Old fashioned, yes. Can I work with old fashioned styles. You bet your hourly wage I can!

Hair is up in a bun, eye shadow to a bare minimum, eyeliner with the pinup style wings and a light red lipstick. My most favorite everyday lipstick. Rebel Red by L’Oriel! It’s really not that flashy. Classy sexy face without overdoing it.

The issue I woke up with this morning was that the pants are a few inches too long! Believe it or not! I have a pair of black patent leather heels that a mere 3 inches in height! I had those set aside specifically for work. I even had to scrounge up a different belt than what I normally wear for work. My usual one is way too big for my waist. I barely get away with using it for clothing I wear around my hips. Please, tell me y’all know the difference between hips and waist.

Ok. Some don’t I’m sure. Let me give y’all an example.

doll_lowhipA woman with curves or an hourglass figure like myself would show a significant difference between waist and hips. I have a small waist! As my mother would say, “Child bearing hips!” I’m not complaining. I like my figure! It does cause some problems in the clothing world. However, I know which styles work for me and what doesn’t. I know if certain clothes are not going to fit for my body type.

Getting off topic. Sorry. I’m pissed remember?

The pants are way too fucking long. Made due with a different belt. Created a classy face and hair. Shoes! The low heels I had originally set aside were too short for the length of the pants. I’d walk into work like a child who raided their mother’s closet!

This is work! I can’t do that! I have to be taken seriously when I speak to people. Who takes a grown woman playing dress up seriously?

Fortunately, I recently purchased a pair of 6″ black patent leather heels for a wedding last weekend.

Don’t get me wrong. I’ve gone to work in 5″ red, pink, and purple heels, closed toed and peep toed. I refuse to wear wedges or sandals to work. That’s pushing the professional envelope. It has not posed a problem in the past. There is another woman at work who loves her heels as much as I love mine. We talk shoes on a regular basis. Where did we find our sales? Different colors etc. These shoes are black and due to the length of pants you can’t really notice the height of the heel. AND because it’s not my first time wearing stilettos to work. I didn’t think it a problem.

My boss notices my wearing the new pants and asks how I like them. I do like them, alright. They’re for work. They work for work, honestly. I mention that they’re too long and that I need to speak with the supervisor about getting them hemmed. Well, as I said this I moved my legs out from under my desk revealing the 6″ heels.

Again, wasn’t ever a problem before!!!

“The pants look good. Not sure about the shoes, though.” He tells me.

“What’s wrong with them? They’re black and they look nice. Not scruffy or anything?” I inquire. I genuinely was curious as to why these shoes weren’t appropriate. Mostly, wondering why this is being brought up now rather than before. Even after I had already mentioned that the pants are too long. I’m workin’ with I got this morning.

“What would you prefer I wear?” I ask. Believe it or not, I’m not being a smart ass throughout this entire conversation!

He proceeds to hold up his fuckin’ men’s dress shoes. “These are more uniform.”

*Grumbles*

You’re joking, right? You’re fuckin’ kidding me! He was laughing when he displayed his shoes for me. But, I didn’t find it funny at all.

“I don’t want to get anyone in trouble. But, my supervisor did say that we could still wear our regular shoes that we’ve been wearing. As long as they weren’t off the wall crazy. I fail to see how these fit that description, Sir.”

“If she’s fine with it, I guess. I’ll talk with her.” He says.

I have half a mind to go through the uniform policy to locate a paragraph on heel height. If one isn’t found the other half of my mind is prepared to hit up HR! This is bullshit! The butch I’m currently dating has already suggested my going to HR to complain about my being a woman forced to wear men’s pants. That didn’t seem like a big deal. I’m able to make due. A woman could easily come to HR complaining that she is forced to wear women’s pants while she prefers men’s.

See what I’m getting at? *Ahem* Butches, if you’re still reading? LOL! I’m sure you can relate to such an HR concern. I’ve heard stories and I know that we all have different body types.

The supervisor has come by and we’ve discussed hemming the pants. No talk about my shoes. I think I’m good.

I know this seems so fucking trivial to many. I’m a fuckin’ femme woman. Are my shoes inappropriate for lack of professionalism or lack of others ability to control their fucking penis?

I know stilettos are a turn on for some. I find it really fucked up that women are always the ones at fault for being too sexy in the work place. While I understand that certain skirt lengths and too many undone buttons would be inappropriate. I refuse to further disregard my gender based on your immature cock.

I really liked this boss. Dammit!

*Grumbles*

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